Who the fuck is Fabrizio?

I had not heard about Fabrizio until he posted a trailer (Black Biscuit) on our Facebook page. Not unusual, except it was our university film society page and he doesn’t go to our university, or live in London (where our university is). Over the next few weeks he posted other things, mainly about Pink8 (Google it, i’m not a spoon).

We joked about the oddity and let it be. But a germ had been planted. Slowly it spread and now I wanted to discover more about Fabrizio. I think I’m in love. I know it will never work, it just makes the bond stronger. I tried to organise a personal interview in order to capture him and chain him to my bed. However he caught on and decided to do one over the internet. Or he was busy, one or the other.

 

This is my feeble, anarchic attempt to unpick him…

 

What are your inspirations?

 Belly dancing, the Mafia, witchcraft, ping-pong and A Clockwork Orange

 

What draws you to a film?

 The fact that it’s a charmed circle, anything goes in film, like Sodom and Gomorrah.

 

What do you feel cinema should be?

 It should be considered holy. Like a virgin whore.

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What are you trying to accomplish with your films?

 I don’t know what your talking about! Im not gonna fucking answer that sick question.

 

Why use non-actors?

 Because they are charmingly dangerous. Actors are scared of me, they think Im going to kill their whole families.

 

What is your idea of success?

 Having loads of crazy vampire girls wanting my babies.

 

What do you look for in a film?

 A weird mix of hallucinogenic comedy, sick surreal reality and wild youth.

 

What do you look for whilst making a film?

 Either a natural disaster or a cultural happening to launch the films direction. Michael Jackson died when I was making Black Biscuit and during Pregnant the stock market crashed.

 

What do you dream about?

 I have this nightmare once a month where Im touching a surface that sends me into a void, I can never pinpoint what the surface is though. Volcanoes erupting, and of me flying through a snow storm without wings.

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In an ideal scene what would happen?

 Would be fascinating to have the ghost of Lee Harvey Oswald, or any other ghost bewitch the scene or possess one of the cast members. Like a card trick.

 

Would you ever adapt someone’s work, if so, who, what and why?

 A hired gun? As long as they’re tasty, who knows. Also, they have to read the whole story and give it to me on an audio tape. Maybe the life story of either Sinead O’Connor, Mao or Norman Wisdom.

 

As you progress and create more how do you think you’ve adapted and improved?

When I was making Black Biscuit I felt like I was about to die. Like I was in a whirlpool, once I’d archived the film I felt a big relief. Im faster now, but Its good to suffer when your creating. I don’t want to be in control, one day they will take me away.

 

Have your initial ideas about cinema changed as you’ve progressed?

The backbone of the idea, that I have the freedom to do and show whatever I want hasn’t gone away, but I don’t want anything to do with tabloids and lawyers, those people need to be castrated amongst the other goldfish. Artists are really martyrs, Saint Bernadette watches over moony boys like me.

 

What do you feel is not worth exploring and why?

 This caricature of me being an arsonist Enfant Terrible filmmaker who wants to personally lynch Steven Spielberg and Tim Burton live during the Oscars with a bottle of shampoo. Those are just childhood dreams, Im in a different place now. It’s all horse shit!! Those types of rumors belong in Beijing.

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What interests you?

Italian juice boxes

 

What do you do for fun?

 Take off my clothes

 

What repulses you?

Everybody losing their fingernails. Splish, Splash, Splonk. Mince and beans and old farmers.

 

What worries you?

Running out of tape and North Korean television.

 

What do you think is your biggest flaw?

Im a pretty mother fucker.

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I’ll just leave this image here so you can make up your own mind.

So there it is. What have we learnt through this whole experience about the enigma that is Fabrizio Federico? That I should have interviewed him face to face. I’ll get him next time. Mark my words.

 He is currently shooting Loon, which will feature a woman eating a used tampon. 

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